Remembering You
by byubabe
Summary: After the attack in Phoenix, Bella wakes up in the hospital with no memories of her life in Forks, and definitely no memories of Edward. End of Twilight/New Moon AU E/B
1. Chapter 1

Bella slowly woke up to the sound of beeping. As she tried to wake up, reaching for what she thought was her alarm telling her to wake up, she found her hand full of wires. Confused she slowly opened her eyes, and was shocked to find herself surrounded in the sterile white of a hospital. Bella frantically tried to remember how she ended up here, but the last thing she could remember was boarding a plane to head to Forks. Her mother had just married Phil, and they were going to move to Jacksonville, so why was she in the hospital? The beeping that had initially woken her up started beeping even faster, keeping up with her fluttering heart rate as she started panicking. It was at that moment Renee and Charlie ran into the room, hearing the increasingly faster beeping from down the hall where they were arguing whether Bella was to go back to Forks, or Jacksonville.

"Honey," Renee cooed, smoothing her hand over Bella's bandaged head. Causing a wave of pain to come over Bella, causing her to wince. Renee's hand immediately left her head, as if she had been scalded. "Oh Bella, I'm so sorry! I'm just so glad you are finally awake."

Bella's eyes narrowed, _finally awake?_ "Mom, what?" Bella started, trying to piece together what had happened.

Charlie sighed and sat down at the end of her bed, running his hand across his face, his eyes pained. "Bella, you were in an accident. A pretty rough one," Charlie looked down, tears in his eyes. "You were in a hotel, and took a fall down the stairs…" He stopped, emotion filling his voice.

"You fell out a window honey, you hit your head really hard," Renee chimed in, filling in the gap that Charlie had left open. "You are so lucky to be alive. If it wasn't for a maintenance worker walking by at the exact moment you fell out…" Renee also trailed off, Bella could guess the words that Renee was too afraid to speak out loud. _You wouldn't be here._

There were too many thoughts running through Bella's head

 _Why am I here?_

 _Why am I not in Forks?_

 _How did I fall out a window?_

 _Why do I feel like a part of me is missing?_

"Mom…" Bella started but her voice was so scratchy. Renee quickly grabbed the ice chips that the nurse had placed in the room earlier, quickly feeding some to Bella so she could relieve her parched throat. Once she felt she could speak again she continued, "Why am I here? I thought you moved to Jacksonville?"

Charlie and Renee shared a quick look. Both of them had assumed Bella had suffered memory loss, and if they were being honest with themselves, they were grateful she didn't remember.

Bella tried to decipher their look, but her headache spiked when she tried to think too hard, so she quickly let it go.

"You just needed a change of scenery. It's spring break back up in Forks. So, you decided to take a quick break down here in Phoenix, you didn't realize that Renee hadn't sold the house yet, so you booked a hotel," Charlie explained, but something about his explanation just didn't make sense. Bella was a meticulous planner, she would have asked her mom if the house had sold. And why spring break in Phoenix? She hadn't left any friends behind when she moved, that's what made it so easy to leave.

Bella went to ask her parents more questions, trying to make sense of her irrational decisions, but when she started to speak, she saw Renee give another look at Charlie, this time even longer than the first, the one she almost missed. Instead of asking her questions, she decided to just stay quiet, not wanting to cause her parents more pain. She would figure everything out later, when her memories hopefully returned.

The longer the silence went on for, the more uncomfortable Bella got, which was a little concerning. Normally she was fine with silence, preferring to be left alone with her thoughts, but with at least 3 months of memories gone, it was making her a little uncomfortable, not even accounting for what seemed to be a never-ending silent conversation between Charlie and Renee.

Bella cleared her throat, making her parents jump and quickly look at her. "Um, has the doctor said if my memories will come back?" Renee and Charlie again looked at each other, this time uncomfortably.

"Baby, you had a ton of swelling, they had to drill a hole in your skull to relieve the swelling. They aren't sure if your memories will come back, they need to run a few more tests, but it's not certain," Renee explained, looking down at her hands the whole time she was talking. Bella looked over at Charlie, hoping to find some more comfort in the man that has always been steady in her life, but instead of finding comfort she just found more sorrow.

"I'm sorry Bells," he sighed, and then looked over at Renee, "We're going to go grab the doctor, hopefully he will be able to answer more of your questions."

The next few weeks were painful. It was psychotherapy session, followed by physical therapy, followed by more psychotherapy. The only headway Bella was making was in her physical therapy sessions, and even then, she was only able to walk a few steps before become to fatigued to go any further. After getting escorted back to her room by a nice nurse with a wheel chair, Bella scowled down at her cast covered leg, praying that it would heal quickly so she could get back to her normal life. She had been in the hospital for a month, the doctors worrying that her head injury was worse than they had predicted, but everything turned out better than they had hoped, instead they kept her just to make sure she was healing at a good rate.

Everything physical was feeling much better, just the cast getting in the way of walking like a regular adult; but Bella's mental state was no better than it was when she first woke up. Which frustrated her to no end. _Why can I not remember what happened?!_ Bella would mentally yell at herself when she failed time and time again to remember her life up in Forks. It was almost like those memories weren't there at all. Like the last three months preceding her incident didn't even happen, and that was more frustrating than anything else. Well, almost anything else. Bella sighed as she heard her parents arguing once again about her decision to head back to Forks instead of leaving with Renee to go to Jacksonville. Bella closed her eyes, remembering their horrible conversation that had happened earlier in the week.

" _Mom, I want to go back to Forks," Bella had said timidly, worried about her mother's reaction._

 _Renee was the textbook definition of calm at Bella's words, placing a soft smile on her face as she said, "Of course Bella, anything you want." Of course, Renee was anything but calm. Walking out of the room a few moments later and stalked down the hallway where Charlie was grabbing a snack from the vending machine. "There is no way in HELL Bella is going back with you to Forks." Renee had screamed loud enough for Bella to hear back in her hospital room, which was quite a feat, especially since the vending machine was all the way down the corridor from where Bella's room was located._

 _What was supposed to be a calm conversation, led to days of fights between the two of them, with Bella in the middle trying not to cry. Even the thought of going to Jacksonville created a huge hole in her chest that made it hard for Bella to breathe._

 _Finally, after pleading with Renee that she had a life up in Forks, no matter if she could remember it or not, did she finally relent and begrudgingly let Charlie make the plans to fly back up to Port Angeles, with Bella._

Bella rubbed her chest where the ache was, it definitely wasn't as bad as it was when she was afraid she was headed to Jacksonville, but it still hurt. When she brought it up to her doctor the day before, he had been a little worried that her lung was being punctured by a rib that should have supposedly been healed by now. But after a few rounds of x-rays, they couldn't find a cause for the pain, and Bella just let it drop, rubbing the spot every time she felt a twinge of pain.

Luckily a few days later came her release day, and she and Charlie made their way to the airport. The flight was rough, but the closer they got to Forks, the less the pain in her chest felt, and that's when Bella knew she made the right choice in going back to Forks. There was something there that she was meant to find again, and hopefully that would be the key to her regaining her memories.


	2. Chapter 2

Getting back to Forks really felt like coming back home. Bella took in her surroundings, realizing that while she might feel like she was experiencing the sights for the first time since she was young, she was really just coming home, and that was a comforting thought.

They finally pulled into the drive and the quaint white house came into view and it immediately brought a sense of peace into Bella's mind, it really did feel like home. Bella unsuccessfully tried to get out of the car on the own, sighing loudly when she couldn't maneuver into a position where she could stand up. Charlie hurried over, laughing when he saw Bella in a position no one should be able to be in trying to get out of the car, and helped her up into the house. Charlie helped Bella onto the couch and helped get her leg in a comfortable position before he started around the house getting her suitcase back up to her room.

Bella took this opportunity to really look around the living room and try to bring some of those elusive memories back up to the surface. She stared at the TV willing even just a small memory of her watching a Mariners game with her dad come up, but much to her frustration, nothing came. There had to be something that would trigger her memories to come back.

 _I came back to Forks, please, please let my memories come back._ Bella pleaded to whatever force would hear her. She ached to remember the missing pieces of her life. She desperately wanted to remember even the tiny things like what she would cook for Charlie. Anything would be better than not remembering.

Suddenly, the pain in her chest grew even more in that moment, causing her to clutch at her chest and gasp for chose that moment to come back down stairs, and when he saw Bella clutching at her chest, he ran over and quickly knelt down by the couch.

"Bella?" Charlie questioned, "Are you okay? What's wrong with your chest?" His hands were fluttering over her, not quite sure if he should touch her, pry her hands away from her chest, or call 911.

Bella tried to smooth her face into something other than a grimace and finally managed to get out, "I'm okay. I'm okay." Praying that her chest would stop hurting quickly so she would stop worrying Charlie, which was the last thing she wanted to do. But this pain was like nothing else she had ever felt before. It was worse than when she almost had to move to Jacksonville, and she thought that was the worst pain she was ever going to feel.

It took a few minutes for the pain to finally subside to the point where she could breathe normally again. Charlie was still awkwardly hovering, his hands still over her body, waiting for Bella to show that she wasn't in as much pain anymore. She gave Charlie a soft smile. "I'm sorry Ch-dad, the pain is just sometimes worse than I'm prepared for. I'm okay now." She looked around, her eyes finally landing on the thirteen stairs that stood behind her and her bed. She slowly looked back at Charlie, who had finally gotten up from his knees and was making his way over to the recliner in the corner, eyes warily watching Bella, just waiting for the pain to come back. Completely prepared to call 911.

Bella closed her eyes, making sure that the pain was still manageable, before she spoke. "Um, I really want to go to bed," she mumbled, eyes moving to the stairs, hoping Charlie would follow her train of thought. His eyes followed Bella's and sighed before helping her up off the couch.

What followed was some extremely careful maneuvering that Bella was extremely surprised she was able to achieve without breaking another leg or breaking Charlie in the process. Their stairwell wasn't quite big enough for two adults to stand side by side, so Bella hobbled, with the help of the rail, up the stairs. Charlie walked behind her, staying two stairs behind at all times, just to catch her in-case she fell. Luckily, they made it up without incident, and Bella was able to curl up in her bed after just a few minutes of attempting to get into pj's before giving up and just sleeping in a large shirt.

Bella looked around her room once she finally got settled in her bed, purple comforter pulled up over her bare legs. Everything was different from what she remembered as a kid, to the bed she was currently sitting on, the deep purple comforter, the computer sitting on the desk in the corner, and the fairy lights going around the room. The only familiar thing was the rocking chair that sat in the corner of her room, placed perfectly so that when you sat in it you could watch the front yard from the window. Even though that was the only familiar piece of furniture in her room, she just couldn't help but feel like this is where she had been her whole life. Everything was just so comfortable, nothing like her various moves with Renee. Each time she and Renee had moved it seemed like she didn't fit in. Even though Bella would make sure that the house was completely decorated, and that her room especially was put together the way it was in each house they moved to, she never felt completely at peace as she did in her father's tiny home. She gazed out the window, and her chest tingled with pain once again, not anything major, but still enough that her hand found its way up to where the pain was coming from. She couldn't shake the feeling that even though everything seemed great, there was one piece of her life missing.

Charlie knocked softly on her door, which broke her out of her reverie and she just as softly, told him to come in. He eased the door open and made his way over and sat at the end of her bed, placing his hand on her cast covered foot, gently rubbing it up and down. They sat like that for a few minutes, just enjoying each other's company, not needing words to express how both of them were feeling. This was the one thing that Bella really loved about her father, while he was a man of few words, he really knew how to make sure she knew she was loved unconditionally. His actions while at the hospital, making sure she was well settled now that they were back in Forks. The small gestures he made while they were on the plane headed to Port Angeles, asking multiple times if her head and leg were doing okay. It was those little things that made her love him even more, and made her even more confident in her choice to come back to Forks.

Charlie cleared his throat, breaking Bella out of her reverie, she smiled up at him as he started to speak. "Bells," His voice broke. "I am so grateful you are okay. You gave us a huge scare…" His voice broke again, filled with emotion.

Bella quickly sat up a little more, reaching over and placing her hand over his on her foot, showing him that she understood, unable to find words herself.

"Just please don't do anything like that again. Don't make any risky decisions, I know you are almost 18, but please, I love you too much for you to leave me this soon," Charlie finally got out what he wanted to say, quickly looking down as a few tears escaped his eyes.

"Dad," Bella started, struggling to find words to adequately express how much she appreciated him. "I really don't say this enough, but I love you so much. Just thank you for being there for me when I needed it. I know I can't remember what we did when I first got here, but I hope we can make new memories." Bella kept her hand on his hand the whole time, hoping that if her words weren't enough, her actions would hopefully express what she meant.

Charlie looked up, and smiled. He took his hand out from under hers, and patted it softly, before getting up off her bed and heading to the door. "Good night Bells," Charlie said as he slowly closed her door.

"Good night Dad," Bella smiled as she eased back down into her covers, but she still had trouble falling asleep, so she just stared out the window, waiting for her to finally feel tired enough to slip into sleep.

While she stared out the window, something felt off. Slowly crawling back out of bed, she narrowed her eyes, trying to figure out what it could be. Bella slowly ran her hand along the window pane, the cracked white paint scratching her hand. Without thinking, she reached out and slowly unlocked the window and raised the pane so she could feel the breeze coming through. Once the window was open, Bella felt finally at peace. Even though nothing was familiar, the window being open just seemed…right.

Letting her hand linger just for a few moments longer, she slowly made her way over to her bed and sank into her bed, a smile on her face as she fell asleep, dreams filled of laughter, and mysterious golden eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

A week after Bella and Charlie finally got back to Forks, Bella finally got up the courage to bring back going to High School. It was only the middle of April, so there was still a good month of school left, plenty of time to continue going to school. Sure, it was going to be hard to get caught back up, but if anyone could do it, Bella was definitely one of those people.

"Um, Ch-Dad?" Bella questioned, waiting until Charlie looked up from his plate before she started talking again. Looking him directly in the eye so he could see that she was serious. "I've been home a week, and I'm getting really restless. Can you please call the school and tell them I'll be back on Monday?"

Charlie looked pained, "Bells, I don't think going to school is a good idea right now." Charlie rubbed his hand over his chin, closing his eyes and sighing before continuing. "I know there is a month left, but why don't you just take that month and then summer. Maybe starting back up in the fall will be better."

Bella's eyes started watering, tears threatening to escape. She had no idea why Charlie wasn't pushing her to get back to school. When she still lived with Renee she had _adored_ school. She read every book asked of her and more. She had loved her science class. She really enjoyed her history class. While she didn't particularly enjoy her math classes, she still did her best.

"Dad, I can't stay in this house anymore," Bella cried as her tears finally spilled over. "I know I've only been here a week, but I was in the hospital for a month, I can't be cooped up. You need to get back to work anyway!" Bella suddenly gasped, the pain in her chest suddenly causing her to lose her breath. Her hand flew to the place where it hurt the most, right above her heart. Putting all the pressure she could bear on the spot, she looked at Charlie with pain in her eyes.

He cringed, hating to see her in so much pain, and hating the fact that Bella had a point. He had already taken a month of family leave to be with Bella down in Arizona, and he really needed to get back and relieve the acting chief. Bella could see Charlie warring with himself over this school decision. On one hand, Charlie could see the benefits of her going back to school. She could make new friends. She could catch-up on her school work so she could actually graduate on time the next year. His other hand showed a completely different story though, and this is the hand that had the slight edge. He and Renee both worried about Bella. While they wanted her to re-gain her memories, there were certain events, certain _people_ they would rather Bella never remember.

Bella continued to sit in silence, hand over her heart, her tears continuing to stream down her face, caused by both the pain, and the fact that Charlie was so unwilling to budge on this simple request. Waiting for Charlie's answer was torture. It should have been such an easy yes from him. What kind of parent didn't want their child to go to school?! She understood she had been in a bad accident, but after her recovery in the hospital the only thing that hindered her physically was the bulky cast on her leg. The only other issue plaguing her was the memory loss, but that would just be an issue that she would have to deal with, _after_ she got back into the swing of school.

Charlie groaned, alerting Bella that he finally had an answer. "Bella, I need to talk to your mother. I'll have an answer for you tomorrow."

Bella started to answer, how dare he not give her a straight answer! It's just school! What was the worst that could happen there? Bella opened her mouth and Charlie quickly started talking. Looking at Bella directly, something he rarely did. "Bella no. Stop. I am your father, and I have the say on what you do until you are at least 18. You have just gone through something traumatic, you don't always know what is the best for yourself after going through something like this." His head dropped after he was done speaking, not wanting to see Bella's tears.

Bella awkwardly lifted herself up from the table and scrambled for her crutches. Charlie, hearing the distinct tap of her crutch hitting the floor, quickly shook himself out of his head and hurriedly scraped the chair along the floor trying to get to Bella quickly. He stopped himself when he saw her hand fly out, her breaths labored as she was trying to hold back tears.

"Stop. I can do this. If you won't let me go back to school because of my injury, I'm going to prove to you that I can be independent," She choked out over her tightening throat, and the increasing pain in her chest. She wouldn't let him see her tears. He didn't deserve it, and she didn't want him to see her as weak.

Charlie slowly sat back down at the table, placing his head in his hands, while Bella jerkily made her way to the stairs. She paused for a moment when she finally got to the landing. 13 stairs, that was what was standing between the awkward fight with Charlie and her room. Her sanctuary. Her room with its purple everything was the only place she truly felt at peace. The only place she completely felt whole.

Bracing herself against her crutches, and taking her hand off her chest, she perilously made her way up those steps, and after a good while, slammed the door to her room and flung herself on her bed, where she started to cry earnestly.

The thought that no rational adult would not allow their child to finish up their junior year just kept popping into Bella's head. Charlie was the chief of police, obviously he had to be a good judge of so many different things to land that job, why wasn't he able to judge correctly that she was obviously so ready to go back! After a few hours of crying and continually horrid thoughts about Charlie, two tiny, miniscule thought wormed their way into Bella's head.

 _Are my parent's being honest about what happened to me in Phoenix? Why else would Charlie need to talk to Renee about me going back?_

Bella suddenly sat up, wiped her now sore eyes and stared out the window. Rubbing her chest, hoping the pain would go away soon. Realizing that those two thoughts made the most sense. Every other decision Charlie had made concerning her recovery, concerning how she handled this week re-acclimating to Forks had been so thoughtful, so helpful. Yet, the moment it was a big decision, where she would be around more than just a few people. Around more than just him, he suddenly clammed up and needed to talk to Renee about the decision.

After thinking over her options, she decided facing Charlie head on was the best course of action. She had always felt comfortable talking to him about hard topics when they would see each other each summer, this should be no different than that!

Bella quickly grabbed her crutches and made her way to the top of the stairs and started to go down them, when the conversation she heard stopped her dead in her tracks.

"Renee, calm down." Charlie sighed. "We've been fighting about this for an hour. Bella needs me to have an answer for tomorrow. You weren't here, you didn't see her face. She's _set_ on going back to school."

Bella narrowed her eyes, so it was her mom who didn't want her to go to school. Everything made so much more sense. Renee had always been the flighty one. The parent who wasn't a parent. Bella's mind went to every time she had to save her mom from a mistake she made, or cook dinner, or pay the bills. Lost in her thoughts, she almost missed what Charlie said next.

"Renee, I don't think we have an option. She doesn't remember anything, I think my threat to the boy will make sure he stays away. I know, I'm worried it's going to happen again too, but I really don't think it will be an issue. Their family is moving away after the school year ends, that was the most I could ask," Charlie paused for a moment before he continued. "Renee, she's going to start back up on Monday. The whole town knows by now what happened. If we don't let her go back, she's going to do everything in her power to fight our decision. We just need to trust that he will keep his word."

Renee answered back, leaving Charlie without any words for quite a while, and when he finally hung up the phone, Bella scooted back along the hardwood floor of the landing and hurriedly shut her door, hoping Charlie didn't hear the sound of it shutting over the baseball game he turned on after hanging up with Renee.

Bella was stunned. She never imagined that the reason why her parents were so against her going back to school was because of a _boy._ Never in her wildest dreams did she think she had a boyfriend. Her classmates in Phoenix never even gave her the time of day. To her knowledge she hadn't even held hands with a boy, let alone been in a _relationship_ with one. Without realizing, since she was so taken aback from that revelation, the pain in her chest started to ebb away, yet she still absentmindedly rubbed at the no longer painful spot.

Getting ready for bed went quickly, especially since she couldn't go into the bathroom without alerting Charlie that she was awake and heard his conversation. Looking over at the clock she noted it was already one a.m. anyway, way passed the time she was normally already asleep.

Once she was dressed in more comfortable sleep clothes, she sank down into her bed, unable to shut off her brain. So many possibilities flying through her head about what this boy was to her. Her thoughts ranging from how he was her possible boyfriend, maybe a stalker who wouldn't leave her alone, or maybe it was just an overzealous classmate who was just her friend, but wanted to be more.

The more she thought about it, the more she just wished she could have her memories back, then everything would just make so much more sense.

Once when watching Aladdin, when she had been no older than 10, Bella remembered her mother asking, "What would your three wishes be if a genie appeared?"

At the time, she had asked for just basic ten-year-old things, things so trivial that they were easy to acquire now that she had the means. But if her mother asked her that question now, the things she would wish for were practically impossible to ever procure. She closed her eyes, and prayed with all she had that her three wishes would magically come true when she woke up the next morning.

 _I wish my parents would stop lying to me._

 _I wish I knew who this boy was, and what he was to me._

 _I wish I had my memories back._


	4. Chapter 4

"Bella…are you even listening?"

Bella blinked a few times, trying to get out of her thoughts. She smiled lightly at the girl who was sitting next to her, "Yes, I'm so sorry…" Bella frantically searched for the name. She had just introduced herself at the beginning of class. She had been very abrasive, making sure Bella sat right next to her in their first period English class. She had even gone so far to practically yell at a classmate to get out of the seat that was unofficially hers!

The girl Bella was _still_ frantically trying to remember her name, just sighed, flipped her hair over her shoulder and frowned. "Bella. It's _Jessica._ We've been friends for the entire school year. I know you don't really remember anything, but that shouldn't be affecting your memory _now._ I've reminded you of my name three times!" Jessica was whining now. Charlie had wanted her to become friends with Bella, but she hadn't really liked her all that much the first time around, and it was beginning to look like it was going to be even worse if Bella couldn't even remember her name.

Bella blushed at Jessica's reprimand. Charlie had told her the day after their argument over dinner that Renee and he decided that she was progressing on her healing at a rate that they were both comfortable with, and she was okay go to back to school for the rest of the semester.

While Bella acted ecstatic on the outside, which she was surprised she could even pull off since she knew she wasn't the best actress, she didn't let on that she had overheard their conversation. Bella had the feeling that if Charlie even had a little inkling that she knew the real reason why they didn't want her to go back to school, she wouldn't be allowed to step foot into Forks High until the mysterious boy had left after the year was done.

That boy was what was occupying her thoughts while Jessica was trying to re-tell multiples stories about everything they had done together previous to her accident. Unfortunately for Jessica, even though Bella desperately wanted her memories back, her sole focus was figuring out which boy her dad was talking about. She just had this feeling that once she figured it out, everything would fall into place. She even prayed each night that if she could figure out this mystery, her memories would miraculously reappear all at once.

"…So, we went to Port Angeles and you…" Jessica stopped talking once she saw Bella's glazed look again. Huffing, she thumped her textbook on her desk, causing Bella to jump and look sheepishly over at Jessica, offering a blush and a shrug as an apology. Which was definitely not good enough for her. "Alright Bella. I'm just _trying_ to help you. Maybe if you would just listen to my stories of our adventures before you decided to lose all your memories in Phoenix it would help you remember!" To emphasize her point, she dropped her English text on the desk again with her last word, again causing Bella to jump.

"Jessica I'm sorry. My mind is just in a different place today."

Jessica sighed. Charlie had said it was going to be rough trying to get Bella back to the place where she was before. She also suspected that Bella told Charlie that she and her were much better friends than they really were. "It's fine Bella, please try to listen at lunch. We'll be sitting next to Mike, Lauren, Angela, Ben, Eric, and Tyler. We all had a ton of fun together. They might be able to help too." With that last bit, Mr. Mason decided class was ready to start.

Bella and Jessica turned around, listening to Mr. Mason drone on about Shakespeare, normally one of Bella's favorite units, but her focus was solely on finding the boy her parents were talking about. She sighed, looking out the window at the shining sun, letting her mind wander on the many possibilities.

* * *

"Alright Bella, this is where we sit!" Jessica said enthusiastically gesturing to the round table in the lunch room. "When they finally get out of line, Mike will sit over here, Angela and Ben right here…" Jessica continued talking while Bella glanced around the room.

Nothing in this small, crowded place was familiar. The multi-colored linoleum was the same generic flooring in the majority of schools, but still didn't hold a special place in her heart. Her eyes wandered over toward the bank of windows letting in the unfiltered sun no one expected for today. Bella's eyes continued to wander, making sure she was nodding and inserting small noises to make sure Jessica thought she was listening, when her eyes stopped on one table in particular.

It was the exact same table that was practically a copy of the other tables littered around the room. Exact same shape. Exact same size. The only thing different was the fact that no one was sitting at it.

Bella narrowed her eyes, something was tugging at the back of her brain, and at her chest. _That table_ was familiar.

"Um Jessica?" Bella placed her hand on Jessica's arm, interrupting her. "Are you sure we don't sit at that table?" She pointed over to the lone table, turning her hopeful eyes to Jessica.

Jessica's nose wrinkled, " _No_ Bella. We have always sat at this table." She sighed before she continued. "Oh look, everyone's finally coming over!" And that was all it took for Jessica to hurriedly push Bella around the table's bench to make room for everyone else.

"So, Bella, how's it feel to be back? Where's Ed-" Jessica slapped his arm, leaning over to whisper something in his ear before he sheepishly turned back to Bella.

 _Ed? Ed who? Do I know an Ed?_ _Is Ed the boy my parents want me to completely forget?_ Bella was desperately hoping something would break through her memories. In the middle of almost giving herself an aneurysm, Angela interrupted.

"Mike! Introduce yourself first. Remember, Bella doesn't remember us." Angela slid in, sitting right by Bella.

"Hi Bella," Her warm smile immediately eased some of Bella's nerves. "I'm Angela, we have next hour together!" She placed her hand on Bella's and gestured around the table, re-introducing everyone.

The hour passed quickly, much to Bella's delight. The people who considered themselves her friends were extremely loud, high energy, and just _draining._ When the bell finally rang signaling the end of lunch, Bella hurriedly got up from her seat and dumped her tray of food, which she hardly even touched.

Angela quickly caught up, "Bella! Let's walk to bio together." The two walked in comfortable silence, something Bella was again grateful for. Jessica had been non-stop talk, and she much preferred Angela's silence. She figured she was better friends with Angela before.

They walked into the Biology room and again, Bella desperately wished _something_ would trigger more memories. Angela lightly took her arm while leading her to the lab desk that had been hers before the accident. Bella's eyes roamed the entire room. She took note of every microscope. Every person sitting down. Even every chair, but nothing jogged anything.

"Alright Bella!" Angela said happily gesturing to the lab table they had stopped at. "This is your table! Your lab partner is out today, but he should be here when the weather turns bad again." She laughed lightly, and Bella just stared at her. _When the weather turns bad?_

Just as she was about to voice her question, Angela started talking again, eyes twinkling with something Bella couldn't quite place her finger on. "Him and his family like camping. The weather here is always rainy and dreary, so the moment the sun shines, they take advantage of the weather. The weatherman isn't always right, but it should be rainy tomorrow." Angela and Bella both heard Angela's name being called from across the room, where a frumpy looking boy was desperately trying to motion her over.

Angela turned back to Bella, "Sorry, I have to go. I'll talk to you after class." Angela left Bella with a small smile, and walked over to her lab table, leaving Bella to her thoughts.

The only thought going through Bella's head was Ed. She was wracking her mind trying to figure out who that could be. _Who even goes by Ed? Maybe Jessica cut him off before he could finish his sentence?_ Bella's thoughts continued to spiral, and when Mr. Banner started class, she was broken out of her trance when he addressed her specifically.

"Bella! It's nice to have you back!" She just blushed and looked down, her hands going to the lip of the desk. She went to look back up and pay attention when her hand slid over uneven grooves.

Curious, she slid her hand back over, her hand fitting into the grooves almost perfectly. The moment she lined up her hands to match the grooves in the table, the ever-present ache in her chest, which hadn't bothered her as much today, vanished completely. Shocked, she removed her hand and immediately placed it on her chest, where the pain had returned.

Timidly, she went to slide her hand back into the grooves, where again, the pain went away. Probing, she slid her hand a little further back and found that the grooves went all the way around the lip of the table, forming what seemed to be a hand.

Just content with the pain in her chest being gone, she left her hand where it was for the remainder of class, a small smile on her face.


	5. Chapter 5

Bella hurried out of the biology classroom, taking a second to glance back at the lab table, and the handprint shaped mark that had cured her ache, to make sure she didn't have to talk to Angela after class. Angela was a very nice girl, but there was just something secretive about her smile, and the look in her eyes really made Bella think that she knew more than she was letting on. The thought to ask her more questions fluttered through her head before she shook the thought away. She had a feeling that even if she did ask questions, Angela would just answer them cryptically.

Shaking her head, she finally slowed down her carefully hurried crutching out of the biology room, allowing herself to take her time getting over to her car, finally allowing herself to think about the smooth grooves she had found under her lab desk, and her mysterious lab partner who didn't show up to school on sunny days.

So many thoughts were going through her mind.

 _What could have caused those grooves?_

 _Could those grooves have been there before I got here?_

 _Are those grooves have been caused by my mysterious lab partner?_

 _Who is Ed?_

Those questions continued to revolve around Bella's head as she made her way down Forks small roads back home, not coming up with any answers, which was extremely frustrating.

As Bella finally pulled into her driveway, she placed her head on the steering wheel, letting a few tears slip down her face. This situation was the most difficult thing she has ever gone through. She thought of all of the hard things she had to do for Renee. She had basically become a mini-adult at a tender young age and while that had its challenges, she would much prefer to go back to those if she could get her memories back.

She just didn't think it was fair. She had done _everything_ right. She had given up everything to come up to Forks to be with her dad so Renee could travel with Phil, and what did she get in return? Lost memories? The fact that she had lost an entire four months of being at a new school just didn't seem fair.

The other thing that didn't seem fair was the fact that her parents were hiding so much from her. There was nothing stopping them from telling her about everything that she was missing from the last four months, but they hadn't even offered to tell her about anything. Charlie had told her about a few of the friends she had made, but she knew that if she asked about the Ed she heard Mike talk about, he would either clam up or make a fake story up. She would never get the truth out of him.

Wiping her eyes, she decided it was finally time to get inside. Charlie was going to be home soon and he would be expecting dinner. Sighing, Bella grabbed her crutches from the passenger seat, and slowly made her way into the house, still fighting tears over how unfair her current situation was.

* * *

Laying down in bed, Bella decided it was time to make a change. She quickly rummaged around in her bedside table, looking for something she had brought with her from Arizona. A leather-bound journal. It had been a gift from Renee a few years earlier. She had been on a 'it's important to write down everything you do each day' kick and had bought Bella the journal. She had never written in it, and Renee had been over that kick as soon as she started it because it had taken up too much of her time.

She ran her hand over the smooth cover, wishing she had written in it before the accident. Maybe if she would have everything would be so much different. Not wanting to dwell on that fact for too long, she quickly grabbed the pen that was attached to the spine and started writing everything that she deemed important from the previous day at school, and everything she had gleaned from Charlie and Renee's secret conversation.

Looking at the digital clock resting on her dresser on the other side of the room, she realized it was way past midnight, and she had been writing for over two hours. She finished up her thought, and ran her hands along the words she had written.

Her most personal thoughts covered five full front and back pages. Hopefully if something happened to her again, reading her own words would help her recover more quickly than she was now.

Bella carefully closed the spine and placed the journal back inside the drawer shutting the drawer softly. She sank down into her covers, just praying again that her memories would just come flooding back. She gave herself a few seconds, praying each second that it was finally time for her memories to come back. She knew it wouldn't work, but she couldn't help but hope. She was right of course, the memories still were hidden behind the deep black curtain that had been a part of her life for the last few weeks now, but it didn't make it any easier.

She finally let herself really cry, knowing with the late hour Charlie wouldn't overhear and come in. Through her tears she looked around the room, something feeling off and realizing the window wasn't open.

Scrambling up, and hopping over to the window, she threw it open. Putting her head through the window once it was all the way up, gasping for the air she desperately needed through her sobs.

"Please. Please help me." She cried to the sky. Hoping someone with some power would hear her and help.

* * *

Bella went through the day as if in a dream. Her morning classes passing quickly as she zoned out in each one, being just aware enough to make it to each class on time.

Lunch came before she knew, and Bella walked into the cafeteria with Jessica, listening to her chatter about her latest date with Mike, inserting polite little noises or comments when needed to keep her pleased. They slowly entered the cafeteria, slowed even more by Bella's crutches, but the moment she finally made it over the threshold of the cafeteria, something deep inside her chest told her, _today will change everything._

Narrowing her eyes at the odd thought, she scanned the room while she and Jessica made their way to their regular table. Dreading having to hear Mike's side of his and Jessica's date. Looking around, everything seemed normal, well as normal as being at the school for one day could tell her. The same people she had observed yesterday were making their ways to their normal tables. The cafeteria was still just as loud as it was the day before, the only big difference was the lack of natural sunlight, since it was raining. Her heart started to fall as her observations didn't bring anything special to mind, until she scanned over the table that had been empty the day before.

Five beautiful bodies filled the table, looking completely out of place. Bella started scanning each of the bodies. There was a big burly one with his arm around this beautiful blonde who was busy looking at her nails. There was a small girl with a pixie cut who was bouncing up and down talking to the curly blonde sitting next to her who was smiling at her with what looked like utter adoration. Her eyes finally landed on the last new student, he had unruly reddish-brown hair, but that was as far as she got before his eyes quickly flicked to hers. Ocher eyes, the same eyes that had infiltrated her dreams for the last few nights were staring right back at her, bringing Bella into a trance, unable to look away. His eyes seemed to show that he was in pain. The pain in her chest decided to make itself known in that moment.

Bella gasped, one hand flying to her chest, causing her crutch to fall. She still couldn't look away from his stranger's beautiful face. His eyes seemed to be conveying the same pain she had been feeling since she had woken up from her coma.

She continued to stare into his eyes as her good leg finally gave out, not able to keep her body up since the crutch had fallen. As she fell, she saw panic enter his eyes he registered that she was falling.

Flashes of memories Bella couldn't remember started flying through her mind, at a rate where everything was a blur, but one thought popped into her head. _I know him._

Bella's eyes began to flutter closed as she braced herself to land on the floor, hoping to be out when she finally hit. The pain never came. Two cool, hard arms cradled her body before she could hit the linoleum.


	6. Chapter 6

_Beep…_

 _Beep…_

 _Beep…_

Bella groaned as the sound of the heart monitor broke through as she started waking up. Not wanting to pass out again, she slowly opened her eyes, squinting at the harsh white light, a big change from the dark behind her eyelids. After her eyes finally adjusted, she scanned the room.

The room was just a typical ER room, it looked just like every other ER she had been in for her long laundry list of injuries she had sustained in her short life. She noted the heart monitor, the pulse oximeter resting on her finger, and the multiple other machines they had hooked up to her, most likely making sure she didn't fall into another coma. She scanned more of the room, when her eyes fell on the body occupying the chair in the far corner of the room.

Charlie was sitting, his head in his hands, and she saw his mouth moving, but he was speaking too low for her to pick up anything he was saying.

Bella lightly cleared her throat, causing Charlie to jump, looking up to see that Bella was finally awake. He rushed over, placing his hands on her shoulders and placing a light kiss on the top of her head. "Oh Bella, you scared me." Charlie stepped away, going over and pulling the chair closer to the bed and sat back down.

"I'm so sorry dad," Bella apologized, upset with herself for worrying him. "But it could have been so much worse."

Charlie's eyebrows came together, seemingly confused as to what Bella was saying. She quickly explained.  
"Sorry, I thought the nurse would have told you," Bella quickly edited in her mind what she was going to tell Charlie, knowing that the boy who saved her was probably the boy he didn't want her to see. It was imperative he didn't know she heard his conversation with Renee. "I lost my balance and my crutch fell, I started falling too and this boy caught me before I could fall, I still passed out, but at least I didn't hit my head. Right?" Bella added the last part when she saw Charlie's face not change from his expression she thought was confusion, instead his face was starting to become more red. He started mumbling something under his breath. He ran his hand over his jawline before he looked up and spoke to Bella again.

"Yes Bella, the EMT's explained that all to me when I met them at the hospital. I'm glad he was there to catch you. Did you recognize him? Was he in one of your classes? What did he look like? I want to thank him" Charlie explained, and then stared at her, waiting for an answer to his questions.

Bella shifted in her bed, each question Charlie lobbed at her made her more and more uncomfortable. She knew her suspicions were correct, this boy who saved her was definitely the boy Charlie and Renee wanted her to stay away from. _But why?_ Bella thought, he had been so nice, and had the same pain in his eyes that she had felt constantly.

Not wanting to get the boy in trouble, she answered.

"I didn't really get a good look at him, so I can't really answer those questions. And I didn't catch what he looked like, I just figured it was a boy because I felt like I was being carried before I completely passed out." While that was a lie, Charlie didn't need to know that she had been eyeing this mystery boy before she fainted, that was a detail he didn't ever need to know.

Charlie eyed her suspiciously, not completely believing that she was telling the truth, but he also didn't want to push Bella any further, and she had never lied to him before, so he let it slide, deciding to believe what she said.

"Alright Bells," Charlie sighed, getting up from his chair. "I hate to do this but they want to keep you for observation tonight, just in case you have another fainting spell. They are a little worried about your previous head injury…" Charlie trailed off, looking past Bella. She could only imagine that he was thinking of her previous hospitalization.

Charlie shook his head, and finally started talking again, "I'll be back tonight, but I need to go finish my shift. Please, just try to get some sleep. I'll be back at 8." And with that, Charlie came back over and kissed her head and took off.

Bella sighed and laid back down, turning over onto her side and curling up. Her chest had started hurting again, but now that she didn't have Charlie to distract her, the pain was overwhelming. Wanting to get away from it, she fell into a restless sleep.

* * *

Bella startled awake, panting. She couldn't remember the dream she had, but it left her with a sense of panic. Quickly surveying her surroundings, she noticed that the chair Charlie had moved by her bed was no longer there. She looked up and saw that it had been moved back to the corner, and instead a new shape was filling it.

Not understanding why, but Bella wasn't surprised to see her mysterious savior sitting in that lone seat. He was seemingly asleep. His chest was rising with deep even breaths, his hands clenched together, resting in his lap, his head resting on the wall behind him, eyes closed.

Bella ached to run her hands over his, wanting so desperately to know why, even in sleep, he seemed so tense. As if he could tell that she was now awake, his eyes suddenly opened, quickly giving her entire body a once over before making eye contact with her.

Bella swallowed thickly. She _knew_ this boy. But boy wasn't even the right word to describe him, he really was a man. The way he was built did not scream high school boy. She didn't know how, she didn't know why that was the only memory that had come back, but she knew that this man was someone in her life before the accident. _Maybe he could fill in my memories._ She thought to herself.

Quickly closing her eyes, she took a deep breath before she spoke. "I _know_ you," she choked out, her voice still raspy from her fainting induced sleep.

His eyes softened, the ocher seeming to swim as he slowly got out of the chair and walked over to her bedside. He softly knelt down by the bed and took her hand. His hands were ice cold, but instead of flinching away, the cold soothed something in Bella that she didn't realize needed soothing.

"Bella," He sighed, bringing his lips to our joined hands, kissing mine softly. "Please, love, what do you remember?"

She stared at him, a puzzled expression covering her face. _Love?_ Her mind couldn't wrap around that simple phrase. Had they been together? Is this the man her father had threatened? She closed her eyes, her face scrunching up in concentration, every ounce of power she had was going to her trying to pierce that thick curtain that separated her now, from her past. Tears started to trickle down her face as she kept meeting wall after wall, each block as unrelenting as the last.

Cool fingers wiping the tears away broke her out of her unsuccessful attempts to remember. She opened her eyes, now bloodshot, and was met with the most loving expression she had ever seen. Unable to form words, she brought her hand to her face, stopping his hand from wiping the rest of her tears away, linking their fingers together against her wet cheek. They just stared into each other's eyes for the longest time, his other hand coming up and caressing the other side of her face, every so often moving to her hair and stroking it, only to move right back to her cheek. The swimming ocher eyes, filled with what Bella could only explain as utter adoration, never left hers.

It was a good while, but he finally spoke again, whispering, "Bella, please." His eyes were pleading, the adoration still there, but something else was brewing under the surface, threatening to take over. "Please tell me what you remember."

Bella started to cry again, not wanting to admit to this perfect, beautiful man that she didn't remember anything specific, just a very strong feeling that she knew him, and the fact that every time she was around him, the ache in her chest faded away.

His eyes were searching hers until she finally had the courage to speak, knowing her words were going to break this man's heart. "I don't remember anything. I don't know who you are…" Bella started sobbing the moment she saw his face crumple, she truly had broken his heart. His head fell forward, breaking their eye contact. He slowly removed his hand from her face, and slowly started unlinking their hand, when Bella finally realized what he was doing. He was going to leave her, her chest started pounding, and the pain in her chest hit her like a truck. He couldn't leave.

Still crying she clasped their hands tightly together, making his head snap up, his eyes full of questions. Unable to speak, Bella quickly gathered his other hand in her free hand, and rested her forehead on his, taking a shuddering breath to steady herself, closing her eyes before speaking.

"I don't remember anything, but I _know_ you. I may not know your name, I may not know anything about you. But I know you," Tears started running down her face again. "I have this ache in my chest, I've had it since I woke up in Phoenix. When I saw you in that cafeteria, I gasped because I felt something clicking into place, when you started to leave just a moment ago, the pain came back. Please, you can't leave me." Bella's sobs came back in full force, she tore her hands from his and placed them on either side of his face. "Please, you can't leave me," She begged through her sobs.

He just brought his now free hands up to her face and started wiping her tears away again. Murmuring softly, his voice soothing Bella's sobs. He brought his lips to her forehead, and left them there while she slowly calmed down, her hands now wrapped around his biceps.

"Bella, Bella, Bella," He murmured against her skin. As her sobs started to ebb, she could understand his soft whispers against her skin. "Please don't cry. Love. Please."

Bella slowly ran her hands up and down his arm before placing them back in her lap and moved her head so she was now facing him again. His face had a small sad smile, and his eyes were filled with pain, just like they were when she first saw him in the cafeteria.

"I'm sorry I don't remember anything, but I know you, and you obviously know me," Bella spoke again, more conviction in her voice. "I don't know for sure, but I'm certain my parents don't want me to remember you." He closed his eyes, only nodding at her statement, which was the only confirmation Bella needed to understand that he really was that boy she heard her parents talking about on the phone.

Bella started to speak again, but the man brought his hand to her hair, stroking it ever so softly. "Yes Bella, they don't want you to see me. I tried to stay away, but seeing you today, broken and bruised, it made me realize I was wrong," His voice full of emotion as he explained himself. "I can't leave you Bella, I tried, but I can't be without you."

They sat like that for the longest time. He was seemingly trying to rememorize everything there was to her. The exact shade of her hair, the multiple emotions her eyes held, the way she felt in his hand. While Bella was willing herself to remember, trying so hard to understand where he fit in the timeline her friends had briefly sketched out for her over the last few days, when something Mike said finally hit her.

"Your Ed, my lab partner, aren't you?" Bella questioned, shocked when his face lit up, and even more when he let out a short laugh before burying his face in her hair.

"Yes Bella, I'm your lab partner," His voice full of laughter as he finally looked at her again. "But please, don't call me Ed. I never liked that nickname, my name is Edward."


End file.
